Sarah Palin is the real victim of everything

I was was actually rather surprised to find people still defend Sarah Palin, even on the Right. Recently in the news in a drunken stupor, I really did think that she was pretty much written off by everyone as a huge embarrassment. But apparently not.

What was just thrown at me in argument by a rightwing troll was how much of a victim she was by evil, hateful liberals. And that’s of course a serious red flag raiser for me.

The link used to defend this? Of course. It came from TownHall.com, which documents the 7 Most Despicable Ways Liberals Have Attacked Sarah Palin. Amusingly it reveals that, to them, everyone is a liberal if they say so. Even though they might not be.

Even though this article is over a year old, let’s go through their seven claims and do a little laughing, shall we?

1. She was sued out of the governor’s office.
   So of course we can’t call her a quitter anymore, because we big meanie liberals are the ones who made her run screaming from the job with our big meanie lawsuits.

   They claim she was "sued out of the governor's office." You know, because those nasty liberals brought so many "frivolous ethics charges" against her. Yeah, that's never happened to anybody on the left ever. Except it has. In fact, Republicans are flinging one big one now. And you don’t see Obama quitting over it.

   In fact when she stepped down, she had only three pending complaints, since the rest had been dismissed, and none of which were threatening to harm the state since the fees that were paid to them were less than 2 million, with an Anchorage paper confirming most of that was simply the salaries these lawyers simply make as their salary anyway. Meaning it was bullshit. She’s a quitter. And she was called on it too. If she were accurate about her lawyer costs, she'd have had a $30,000 per hour attorney.

   However, she's quite the lawsuit slinger herself. She threatened to sue bloggers, threatened to sue an author of a book, threatened to sue police for doing what they asked them to do, and she even threatened lawsuit by serving papers in a Kindergarten class to sue a blogger!

2. Sarah Palin was falsely blamed for the attack on Gabrielle Giffords
   Palin wasn't blamed for shooting Giffords. She was called out, however, for a great deal of language expressing violent revolution. The Right calls frequently for the need of guns to be in the hands of many people in case they should ever have to overthrow it. Fox scares the living shit out of the lowest common denominator. Palin had just been the most recent one to do so when it had happened. Using "lock and load" in speeches and imagery suggestive of shooting opponents, showing herself shooting at targets as she discussed Republican tactics, it should hardly be surprised. But nobody said she pulled the trigger. And if anything, Giffords’ most recently defeated opponent, Jesse Kelly, should’ve gotten the most attention instead of Palin, in doing exactly all the same things in his campaign. Even worse, his fund raiser was to come shoot an M-16 and “Remove Gabrielle Giffords” from office.
   
   But you know, Palin insists she didn’t use any hateful rhetoric. Oh no, you betcha she didn’t, nopee dopee, because liberals are the real violent ones don’tcha know. And why? Because the liberal show, Crossfire, on CNN… I mean hello!!! Yes, she said that shit.

3. Hustler did a porn movie about her called, "Who's Nailin' Paylin?"
   Hustler is a porn mag that mocks everyone. Suddenly they're a liberal. No, not just a liberal, but indicative of all liberals everywhere. Because that's what the Right thinks about liberals. We're all just smut-peddaling porn-hustlers apparently. And, because nobody's ever mocked a woman unfairly on the Right, have they?
   
   

4. Her email was hacked.
   Yes, a 20-year-old boy in Tennessee hacked her emails. And he has been thoroughly punished for it. He is the son of a Democrat but to call him liberal or representative of liberals is a bit of a stretch. And that's never happened to anybody on the left ever. Or anything. And rightwing news sources have never done anything so despicable either.
   
   Although when it has (or well, it happened against scientists, and you think they're a bunch of liberals in a big conspiracy), she rather celebrated it and pretended that it exposed some huge scandal that exposed scientific lies, saying Obama shouldn't even attend climate conferences anymore because it's all a lie! Seriously:
   
   "The president's decision to attend the international climate conference in Copenhagen needs to be reconsidered in light of the unfolding Climategate scandal. The leaked e-mails involved in Climategate expose the unscientific behavior of leading climate scientists who deliberately destroyed records to block information requests, manipulated data to 'hide the decline' in global temperatures, and conspired to silence the critics of man-made global warming."
   
   It did nothing of the sort, but rather than punish those hackers, she wanted something else:
   
   "I support Senator James Inhofe's call for a full investigation into this scandal."
   
   She went on to suggest it should kill any and all "cap-and-tax plan," so apparently email hacking to create political advantage is just fine by her. I get these quotes from a rightwing source, btw.
   
   And it's interesting, considering she'd just called for people to do more about climate change not long before, since it's abundantly evident in Alaska. Although the "scandal" really didn't disprove anything about climate science. At all.

5. David Letterman made a statutory rape joke about Sarah Palin’s daughter
   Letterman actually made the joke about the underage daughter, confusing her with the other older daughter. He also formally apologized for this, but Palin never did apologize or take any responsibility for her violent imagery against Giffords. She put on the act that she was the real victim in all of that jazz instead. More than anything she was upset because Letterman’s joke's purpose was to satirize how the ones with abstinence only education on their tongues end up with the most pregnant kids ever. That was his intention. Not to wish rape on a child. But of course if someone on the right had said something horrible, she’d rush in to defend them. Naturally.

6. Andrew Sullivan pushed a crazy Trig Truther conspiracy theory
   Andrew Sullivan is a CONSERVATIVE. I get it though. You think he’s liberal because he’s a gay man. But no, he’s an infamous rightwinger and absolutely insists upon people knowing it.

   I find him hot as hell, but a massive hypocrite who spews quite a bit of hate against the gay community in public, while dabbling in its sins in reality. He, like Palin, preaches abstinence and personal responsibility, but like her daughters, is hardly abstinent. He is known to bareback at sex parties all the time. He posted barebacking panels by the username, RawMuscleGlutes, for condomless anal. Just like a conservative: preach morals you don't follow. He blames gays for HIV, and yet is HIV POSITIVE and yet has sex unsafely.

   But hey, you don't like him so he must be liberal or something.

7. A stalker/journalist moved in next door
   I have no idea who this person is, but yes. You have a point about one person. That's creepy. Nobody’s ever stalked someone to further their career before ever, right? But this one chose Palin. I don’t get that at all. I mean seriously, people who move and stalk and creep the fuck out of people just to desperately get dirt on them and try to ruin their reputation are just......

Oh. Well. There you go.